An excerpt from my prayer journal....

I decided to share what I wrote in my journal this morning...

I woke up at 545am to Amy's call to confirm that we were walking at 6.
I though about backing out because my bed felt like the best place in the world I could be at that moment.
The truth was that upon waking I actually felt perfectly able (physically) to get up and face the day (...other than a back ache which subsided after walking :)
But I was very tempted to crawl back into bed at 655 when Amy left. I convinced myself to at least take a shower before wimping out and going back to bed. After showering I still couldn't get mentally pumped to spend time with the Lord. After all, a little nap before work seemed so pleasant. Fortunately, I didn't let Satan win. I thought about the Screwtape letters (a book brilliantly written by C.S. Lewis. This book is Written as if it is a compilation of letters from Screwtape, a very experienced and senior demon, giving advice and correction to his young demon nephew wormwood who is assigned to a certain human with the goal of doing everything in his power to get that human into hell on the humans own accord.)
I realized my demon has me right were he wanted me...well little wormwood, your going to have to give a bad report to your uncle today! I'm going to spend time with my Jesus today!
It is 7:34 and I'm going to start reading Esther. I should have started reading Esther almost a week ago...since the first day of our Beth Moore study of Esther began last Tuesday. I'm going to get my workbook on the way to work and I now resolve to be diligent in keeping on schedule with my homework so that I can get the very most of this study.
I'm very excited about studying Esther. I desire to be wise and discerning like Esther. I want to be brave like Esther. I want to learn from her the discipline of knowing when to speak up and when to hold my tongue.
Thank you Lord for your word. Thank you for allowing me to live, for a time, in a place where we can access the word of God at any moment, where we can gather and worship freely, and where we can profess you as our Lord and saviour without fear of imprisonment or other physical persecution.
But Lord, if the day comes when our free America is lost and our precious rights to worship and claim you are taken from us, I should rejoice even more
"Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are you when people insult you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.
Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven." Matthew 5:10-12a

"But remember the former days, when, after being enlightened, you endured a great
conflict of sufferings, partly by being made a public spectacle through reproaches and tribulations, and partly by becoming sharers with those who were so treated.
For you showed sympathy to the prisoners and accepted joyfully the seizure of your property, knowing that you have for yourselves a better possession and a lasting one.
Therefore, do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God, you may receive what was promised.
FOR YET IN A VERY LITTLE WHILE,
HE WHO IS COMING WILL COME, AND WILL NOT DELAY.
BUT MY RIGHTEOUS ONE SHALL LIVE BY FAITH;AND IF HE SHRINKS BACK, MY SOUL HAS NO PLEASURE IN HIM.
But we are not of those who shrink back to destruction, but of those who have faith to the preserving of the soul. Hebrews 10:32-39
8:35am
(End of journal entry)
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I'm inconsistent with my journaling but I've been trying to get on a schedule that allows spending time with the Lord, praying and being in the word to be my number one priority. I struggle with getting up in time to accomplish all the things I want to before going to work.
Since July I have been getting up every morning just in time to walk at 7am with Amy (my dear friend and workout buddy)
so it was almost 8 by the time we would get back to the house. I would make coffee and Amy would stay and chatter with me while I would do laundry or unload the dishwasher, or vacuum or whatever chore was weighing on me that morning. Then it was time for me to get ready for work and run out the door. I Would try to read my bible at work but I'm usually much to distracted to pray very intimately. Sometimes I spend some time in prayer and the Word in the evenings at home but still I am distracted by my impending bedtime and shortly become so very enticed to sink my head into the sweet conforming softness of my pillow.
Well, my dear Amy started a new job last Monday so we took last week off and today we started our new routine. Start walking promptly at 6 so Amy can leave by 650 for work.
This is perfect because I can make coffee, shower and then have my quiet time all before 815 then do a little housework and head out the door for work. Friends, Please pray for me that the Lord will renew my strength each morning so that I can be consistent in this.
For those of you that don't know, I have been suffering from fatigue and tiredness off and on for a couple of years now.
I have been doing much better now that I have a regular routine. No more crazy Starbucks hours has been so good for my health!
Before I close this very long post I must say that the story of Esther is so cool!
I mean just as a story it's so interesting and then on top of that we get to learn from it. I'm pumped about studying Esther with the ladies!
If anyone would like to join us on Tuesday evenings at 6 to do Beth Moore's study on Esther your are welcome! tomorrow (Sep.22) is just the second week and dinner is provided! just message me if your interested.